Editorial: How I Defeated Excessive Hyperbole (And You Can Too!)

March 3, 2014 heralded the day when, as I noted in my post, World War II (2.0) had started. I stated, “Both sides believe they themselves lead the charge of heavenly angels against Satan himself incarnate, who stands strong leading his army of mini-Lucifer clones.” Apparently, my satanic graphics and general rant against incorrect terminology in armies wasn’t enough. And seeing my anger (my evil anger) once again foaming, we’re engaging in a bit of education. 

My sentiments as I begin this post.

Sitting on my favorite army chat today, an argument erupted. That’s not new. And it wasn’t long until words like “evil” started flying around. That, sadly, is also not new. All across armies today, we have apparently forgotten that we were formed, in the first place, for war. We attempt to justify our actions, which is all fine if you want to play world police, however we go way too far.

As I said in the beginning, in March a conflict (that was short-lived to say the least) erupted between the Nation of Domination and the New Regime Alliance. Covering the war in its early days, I became increasingly frustrated with the declaration of war posts and the way they compartmentalized and categorized armies. Full for the full debunking of that stupidity, see here, but most of it will be revisited later in this post.

The folks over at Small and Medium Army Central, on June 1st of this month, covered the beginning of the Royale Penguins Multi-Logging. While I do appreciate their breaking the story first, and while SMAC’s CEO has full knowledge I’m about to do this, I want to draw your attention to part of that post. Berbatov64, Executive Director of the establishment, states “Will the Royale Penguins regret this satanic act?”

This only fueled my increasing anger over what I’ve been fighting against since that March war. Let’s talk about something called yellow journalism for a second (further reading). One of the best examples of Yellow Journalism from your history class is the sinking of the Battleship Maine, which would lead to the beginning of the Spanish-American War. The war was largely due to exaggeration of the events as Pulitzer and Hearst competed for a better audience. It’s a great example of the media influencing opinion and, well, causing war.

This doesn’t make things any better, however. In modern times, yellow journalism is regarded as unprofessional and unethical, and causes more problems than it’s worth. A more general term for all this is an excessive use of hyperbole.

Hyperbole (/hˈpɜrbəl/ hy-pur-bə-lee Greek: ὑπερβολή hyperbolē, “exaggeration”) is the use of exaggeration as a rhetorical device or figure of speech.

Hyperbole does have a purpose and is something you’re taught in Language Arts Class, however something many seem to forget as they enter the real world is that there is a time and a place, and there’s a way to take it too far. I hope to explain how to liberate yourself from excessive hyperbole and the abuse of words by teaching you the ways armies do it wrong. Let’s talk about the word EVIL. Big, bold, red letters, evil. 

e·vil,ˈēvəl/; adjective
1. profoundly immoral and malevolent.

I would conservatively estimate the word evil has been used about ten thousand times in the army community since its founding, whether that be the kid you’re yelling at on chat, the army you just declared war on, or the comment chain you’re arguing in. In wars, especially conflicts like the White Alliance vs. Black Alliance, we have literally defined armies as having a “good” and an “evil” side. This, while not great, is okay. But it gets to be a problem.


THIS, however, is a problem. 

All taken from prominent army sites and quotes of powerful leaders, this gives a glimpse of just how far this disease has spread. In the past, people have addressed the “cyberbullying” aspect of it, though those people tend to be the exact same ones who call others evil. If this seems harmless to any of you, let’s put things in perspective.

This is terrorism. Any army who fights the Army Republic does not embody this. 

This is brainwashing. The New RPF, for making its troops hate Elmikey, is not evil. 

This is Adolf Hitler. Any army leader, no matter their actions, is not this man. 

A problem stemming from our pathological need to identify those against us as “evil” has to do with the very man above. Probably because we’ve learned more about him than most other men of evil in our education, Adolf Hitler is a poster boy here in armies for people we’re against. See below.

Redd Kool; despite your unwavering dissatisfaction with this site, this comment is your worst. Club Penguin Army Central, again CLUB PENGUIN Army Central, is not literally Hitler. Club Penguin Army Central did not kill some thirty million people.

Rabbit720; the differences between Lord Pain and Adolf Hitler are immense. Hitler brainwashed an entire country, Lord Pain tried to take over some chats, websites, and rolled the occasional blunt. Lord Pain isn’t the most evil man of the last century.

Buritodaily; I regret to inform that Lord Pain and Ioioluk, despite whatever they’ve done to you or armies, are not an Austrian politician who leads the Nazi Party, and you saying “Not to be mean” is about as meaningful as the girl who was “sorry” earlier today for stabbing her friend nineteen times.

Despite Burito’s tendency to name his enemies as Hitler, as far as I know he has not changed the name of the Army Republic to the Hitler Republic. Perhaps we could get him to clarify that in the comments so we can show just how much of a bigot you are, but the Army Republic shut down before embracing any form of Nazism.

Despite the fact that you’re probably another member of the RPF baby boom who’s been subjected to not one but two brainwash sessions, I can’t pity you on this one because you’re actually comparing your former leader to Adolf Hitler. I regret to inform you of this, but Elmikey is not Adolf Hitler. He can sit behind a chat recruiting all he wants, he can curse me out all he wants and he can label anyone he wants as evil — even if he’s part of the problem, so are you.

 Whats Up11; despite thinking not-funny sexist jokes are way too funny and despite commanding an army of trolls that can spam CPA Central’s comments whenever he wants, Waterkid has the upper hand on you by miles right here. Waterkid100 is completely correct when he asks why he is being compared to Adolf Hitler, a mass murderer, because he leads a Club Penguin Army. Waterkid’s sick fascination with Hitler, as well as Shiver’s or any other army leader, does not make them physically Hitler.

To say that Waterkid — or any army leader, any person — is “literally Hitler” or “worse than Hitler” is both an incredible insult to all those who were victims of his evil and a trivialization of the evils that this man committed. There is absolutely no justification, nor has there ever been, nor will there ever be an instance in this community where such as insult is appropriate for use.

The word EVIL, while it may start out as offhand or joking or not serious, snowballs. Not only is it unnecessary, incorrect, an excessive use of hyperbole and an exaggeration of what the word is meant to mean, it is glorifying yourself as someone who can decide that these acts of war in a Club Penguin community — that your side is somehow on an equal level to the veterans that fought and died for your country to stop these evils acts — acts which, may I remind you, were truly evil, and were not your opponents in a Club Penguin game. Compared to these men and women who served, you’re children and you’re cowards, and we all are. To reference events in this community to real-world issues that have spanned centuries and claimed millions upon millions of lives is base, immature, and disgusting, and a massive f*** you to anyone who does it. 



CPA Central CEOs


56 Responses

  1. Some how I always knew my noob days would come back to haunt me in the end…

    • who said you stopped being a noob

      • I still sleep with one eye open at night.

        • o

  2. nice post m8

  3. Highly relevant:

    • We looked into this and thought about using it but eventually didn’t; useful for reading though.

  4. The community needed this post.

  5. Ur literally hitler


  7. I have overcome my noobities and have since recovered from my dire state last year.

    I’m a success story.

    There is yet hope for others.

    Is anyone proud?




  8. Adolf Hitler was a GOOD MAN. He actually CARED about his country and people, unlike cowards today like George W. Bush or any Republican for that matter. He was a powerful leader and he envisioned a great German Reich. He used his power to save his own nation, rather than personally benefit, leading Germany out of a depression and making them the world’s greatest power by 1936. If you forget the Holocaust (which was organized by Heinrich Himmler and not Hitler) then Hitler would be the greatest leader of all time. What other leader was born into a poor, unknown family and died one of the most powerful men to ever live?

    • And no, I’m not a Nazi. I think Hitler was a great leader.

      • i fully support adolf hitler, and i personally feel bad for the poor souls who think he was the worst man of the century, i didnt like how he killed homosexuals and gypsies but the jews deserve it, they run everything and fuck everything in the USA, they are a inferior beings to this planet and should be destroyed, and for “worst man of the century” you should have put stalin, he killed way more than hitler and he would have probably supported the holocaust if hitler didnt invade russia.

    • Yet, no one will forget the Holocaust and even though Heinrich Himmler organized it, Hitler never tried to stop it because…. he hated Jews. So killing 6 million Jews and trying to take over the world is a good leader to you? That puts a bad taste in my mouth.

      • Ability to lead has nothing to do with bigotry or racism.

      • you can’t judge someone’s leadership skills based off the things they did as a leader e.g. holocaust, that is like saying a sandwich is bad because it’s not an airplane

        if you overlooked the holocaust and the antisemitism and only looked at how Hitler led Germany (which by the way managed to get Germany out of its depression from WWI), you’d realize that he was trying to do what was best for his country at the time, similar to how leaders rise CP armies into the top 10 in 2 weeks

        the only bad taste in your mouth is your dad’s seed

        • But his idea of the “best for his country” was trying to take over the world, instead of trying to work with the world powers that were right on his doorstep.

          • Hitler wanted a powerful Germany and to regain their 1918 borders. It could not have been done without war.

            • I know I shouldn’t really comment this. But as my great grandfather had to flee Austria due to this I think I should comment this. If they just wanted their land (borders) back. (Which I perfectly understand since they were hit pretty hard in WW1.) As I understand borders (land around Germany) Why did they attack Greece, Norway, and (not all) but part of Egypt. Although I thought they attacked North Africa it doesn’t say anywhere online. As I had to look it up to see if what you were saying is correct. The whole point of his post was not to put CP Armies and Hitler or any type of evil together. As it’s just a game.

    • He did build an empire greater then the Roman Empire in the matter of 4 years. He solved a depression from World War I and he DID NOT cause the holocaust, Heinrich Himmler, leader of the Waffen SS and created Concentration Camps/Death Camps. While he did have a HUGE ego, causing the death of 2 entire armies(Stalingrad) He is one of the best Empire Builders and Public Speakers of the past few decades. Good/Evil are terms that are different to different people. When you were an American in World War II, you thought Germany was evil, when you were a German in World War II, you though the US was evil. While I do not like the use of Good/Evil in this community, please keep in mind, these words are very much the same, while being extremely different.

      • But really, how long would the Germany Hitler built have lasted? I can’t imagine it being stable at all.

    • The Fuhrer will ensures Himmlers actions are done in the name of Hitler.

    • Skilled leader? Yes. Genius, even? Yes. But a good man? Absolutely not.

      Himmler was by no means the sole architect of the Final Solution; and even if he was it would never have succeeded without the mass brainwashing conducted by Adolf Hitler in order to convince the German people that the Final Solution was a good thing. Mein Kampf openly proclaimed Hitler’s hatred of the Jews, and in 1922 he told a journalist that:

      Once I really am in power, my first and foremost task will be the annihilation of the Jews. As soon as I have the power to do so, I will have gallows built in rows—at the Marienplatz in Munich, for example—as many as traffic allows. Then the Jews will be hanged indiscriminately, and they will remain hanging until they stink; they will hang there as long as the principles of hygiene permit. As soon as they have been untied, the next batch will be strung up, and so on down the line, until the last Jew in Munich has been exterminated.

      Yes, antisemitism had existed in Germany for a very long time. But it took some prodding to go from antisemitism to outright murder. That’s where Hitler comes in. It was, in fact, not until Hitler’s 1933 takeover of the NSDAP that Nazisim became so deeply entwined with antisemitism – Hitler himself was the one who introduced the Nuremberg laws.

      You are certainly free to say that Hitler was an incredibly powerful man, a skilled leader, etc. etc. But to say he was a “good man” is either blatantly ignorant of historical fact or blatantly in support of his actions.

    • Good leader, shitty person.

    • Please explain how murdering 6 million people makes you a “good man”.

      • when the majority of them were jews and blacks it makes him a good man

    • Classic case of ‘terrible person, good politician’. Other examples include Nigel Farage and Vladmir Putin.

    • Oh so are you saying to forget the fact that some 30 million people were killed by the Nazi regime?

      That Hitler was the Fuhrer of.

  9. i got cut

  10. The only thing in human history that has came remotely close to being evil is the Nazi Empire at their worst, and Dick Cheney. No one in armies, despite how low they are, is evil. They have their own agendas which they consider good. The closest thing we have to Evil in armies would be the CPAC staff without their coffees.

    • Stalinism/bolshevism was significantly more evil than fascism. They don’t even know how many people died under Stalin.

      • I agree tbh.

  11. Great post. CP armies should be all about fun and games, not making each other feel bad for being on the opposing team.

  12. Okay, c’mon? 2 years ago?

  13. For Burrs comment, he did say “of this community” which is very different from “literally Hitler” thats just plain stupid.

    Hitler was a great leader. Hitler was a brilliant man. Hitler had admirable qualities in him. He was was also an evil man (yes, evil applies here, mind you) Hitler could have used his ability to move and speak to people for something more productive than mass genocide, but he didn’t. For that, he will be forever be regarded as the archetype for evil. We throw virtual snowballs, we don’t kill people. People get couped, people don’t die. (not even Juju). To compare anyone to Hitler or Nazism is offensive, as Blue said.

    Frankly, I think this concept of trying to demonize an army or person by using words like “evil” was popularized by Elmikey in RPF. All of his troops were painfully young and naive. By saying the enemy was “evil and bad and wished to hurt people, but we are good and we fight all the evil like Superman and Batman and all your favorite heros!” he was able to keep them in line. It went viral from there, and now that he’s gone its nothing but a pain in the ass.

    • I think in the actual situation, I was being very sarcastic or just screwing around.

  14. I hate armies that feel that war needs to be justified.

    • And then end the war with the army they ‘vowed’ to destroy 2 days leader. #2014

  15. Good thing my post about Elmikey being Kim Jong-un got deleted in the defacing of SMAC.

  16. ur evil!!

  17. Instead of demonizing enemies and coming up with silly justifications, how about just declaring war for, you know, fun, or competition, just for the sport of it? Of course, maybe this suggestion would make me “literally Hitler”.

  18. good and evil does not exist. they are only opinions.

  19. This is a wonderful post, and something I’ve noticed in the last few months is the serious attempts made by numerous army leaders to degrade others. Like you’ve mentioned, “evil, hitler, tyrants, brainwashed” are just a few of the many slurs thrown around our community. And, all of the time, none of them have any relevance or meaning behind them. They’re simply used, because in the modern day CPA community leaders are not original and have younger troops who are swayed and manipulated easy, and will pretty much believe anything their superior says to them.

    It truly is sad to see some of the attempts to attack other leaders. Everybody in this game just wants to have fun, nobody’s trying to physically or mentally destroy a person’s life on this game, so why people are labelled “evil” is way beyond me.

    This applies to Elmikey too. Some of the abuse directed at him is downright sad. Just because Mikey isn’t a media suck up like Puckley was does not make him a bad person, in my view he’s completely brought new life into this community. Think about it, who would have been the main antagonist of armies had Elmikey not re-listed in the RPF last year? Waterkid already had that role for a good two years.

    To be considered “a good guy” in this community, I believe you mus be a media suck up who acts nice in comments and posts. That’s how I view it, and I mean absolutely no offence to CPAC or any other media organization involved in this community.

    I hope people can work together and co-operate more in armies instead of trying to bully each other with words and phrases with absolutely no correlation behind them. Soon enough, this community will be faced with adversity with the arising problem in CPNext, and if we can’t work together now, how will we react then?

    • Media suck up? Uh, okay…

    • Why do you seem to have some kind of vendetta against the Nachos, all you ever do is complain about us 🙄

      • I’ve barely commented on this website up until April or so since I retired 15-16 months ago so I’m not sure what you mean by that.

        I dislike the Nachos because I’ve had many wars against them, and labelling Puckley as a media suck up was not meant in any harm, I stated him because he’s liked by almost everybody in the community.

        • I was referring to in general, rather than simply on CPAC. Funnily enough, I used a hyperbole, don’t kill me Blue 😥

        • Your terminology is flawed then because that’s not what suck up means.

  20. herherher

    • n00b

  21. Only one person was “literally Hitler”

    That was fucking Hitler himself.

    Stop being being stupid and trying to demonize other people. Because it fucking annoys me.

    • What about Hitler’s dad?

  22. The Satanic news site CPAC is trying to stifle creativity by telling us what to say

What do YOU think? Comment your opinion!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: