Edit: This is an old The Funnies, and its original release date was suppose to be January 15th, but it was never released due to reasons I will clarify to my supervisors. The reason why only 6 armies are listed is because during the time I was disconnected from Club Penguin Armies, these were the only armies done. For this long time gap, I sincerely apologize.
Hello everyone, Mach here for another edition of The Funnies, that post that makes you roll on the floor laughing. In this edition of The Funnies, is “leader bio’s” or if you want the whole name “Club Penguin Army Leader Biographies” .I will only do 1 leader per army. Now, here goes nothing :
1. Dark Warriors
Leader : SaW
Real name : Jigsaw
Bio : Saw (Jigsaw) likes to swim, eat ice cream, oh and did I mention he is a serial killer. He makes his victims play sick demented games, and also, he doesn’t brush his teeth, and surprisingly, he only has 4 inches on Chucky. Talk about a midget…
2. Ice Warriors
Leader : Albert
Real name : Alberto Del Rio
Bio : Albert (Alberto Del Rio) is the current IW leader. He loves to watch anime with his best friend (and boyfriend) Iceyfeet. Together, they rule over the IW, even though Icey is like 5 months retired from IW, if not more. Did I mention Albert wears mayonnaise as cologne.
3. Army Republic
Leader : Capncook
Real name : Jesse “Cap’n Cook” Pinkman
Bio : Known for his addiction to heroine, Capncook(Jesse Pinkman) is the AR leader. He also has history with meth, cocaine, weed, pot, and pain killers. He still bathes with his rubber ducky skittles, and has a picture of Bert and Ernie in his bedroom.
Leader : Waterkid
Real name : Cup of water
Bio : Not only is he the dictator of Pirates, but he has kept them strong under his dictatorship. He is one of the most important resources to the Pirates, since they cannot drink sea water, so they put him in charge. Once the cups empty, he’s in huge trouble.
5. Golden Troops
Leader : Wenny
Real name : Winnie the pooh
Bio : Not only is he famous for appearing on various Disney shows and movies, but he is a children loved character who wears no pants. At least he has more clothes than Elmo…
6. Underground Mafias Army
Leader: Super Paco24
Real Name: Juan Pablo De Pedro Escobar Montoya Mis Tacos Garcia
Bio: Paco is a Mexican boy from Tijuana but border hopped with his father to make money for his 301 siblings and his 3 moms. Paco sold oranges in front of home depot to bay the bills and his papi would yell at him if he did not complete his orange vending goal. Paco later ran off after his father whipped him and got deported. Paco worked at a farm for many years and lived in a box. He later got into the Taco business and became “El Manager de Tacos” he felt a thirst for power so he went to UMA in a cap that says “USA” to avoid deportation and be looked at as a fellow white man by his fellow UMA.
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